So I sat there, about 30 minutes left in college, and I waited. I’m not really sure what I was waiting for. I think it was some sort of sudden realization, I wanted something to hit me like a train, I wanted to know exactly what was gonna come after college. I wanted to know exactly what the fuck I’m gonna do next. But it never happened. I finished the exam and went drinking. Absolutely killed the session in fairness, but I couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed.
I guess I’m writing this because I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. Whether you’re finishing college or the Leaving Cert, or even don’t feel like you’re doing the right course, it’s sorta scary not having a clue what’s gonna happen next. I suppose I wanted an epiphany at the end of exams because that would make it easier, I could just jump right back into the safety of what’s familiar.
But how boring would that be?
No good story I’ve ever heard went like “Everything worked out straight away.” I think you have to go through some adversity, some terrifying confusion and sense of being completely unsure. Because if you have that hardship first, when that epiphany does comes, when you wake up one day and realize you made it, that you are where you wanna be, it’ll be so much sweeter than having known all along.
Recently a friend told me “Embrace the confusion” and to be honest it’s the best advice I can pay-forward. The penny may have not dropped yet, but when it does…. That’s gonna be a good day.
(I wrote this a couple of days ago but saw a video this morning that fits in nicely here. Gotta love when things work out….)